Ahhhhhhhhhhh, where to begin? First, must get some water.... Better. Need to clear the head... Smoke? Ok. What am I doing? What do I want? Why do I allow the ex to hurt me so much? Is it a sign that I truly love her or is it a sign that perhaps I am truly crazy? Maybe I am. Why can't I let it go? Why do I email her? Why do I think about her? Why am I such a sucker?

Better yet... why am I writing about this? It's done. It's over. It's been over. She hates me. Cope and move on. I tried the superficial relationships to pass my time and that didn't work. But now I've found someone that I really like. Someone who is smart, beautiful, funny, passionate, caring... I could write for hours about all the great time we've spent together. Why can't things ever be simple? I'm so bad at this. I'm bad at trying to woo people.

Pleh... time to read the news. Too much thinking while drinking. It's never a good thing. I miss TT.